Review

I haven't written an article for a school paper since around this time last year. I'm signed to do an album review for Nortt's "Galgenfrist" which is something I can do, but for some reason I don't know how to start it. I guess the desire to not be amateur and just be like "Nortt's great!!!1 Check him out!!!lolxz" is stress. I'm thinking about just jumping into it, but probably I will write the body of the review before any witty Macalester intro. Fantastic album though. Peep the link a few posts down.

I miss Philadelphia. I got into a big, friendly argument with some of my Midwestern friends this afternoon about how all I ever talk about is Philly, and how I'm demeaning to every other city or region whose residents could potentially have some pride. And the thing is, I'm like, what? So what? Fuck it. I love Philly and I don't give a fuck where you're from. On that same note, why in the name of god did I ever decide to come to school in motherfucking Minnesota? Minnefuckingsota? I mean, the school is fine but this place is just fucking awful. I would've survived in New York. I should've just gone to American. Maybe I'll transfer. Who knows.

I've also been thinking about tattoos recently. I definitely want some. The two big ideas I've had for a while are something related to Philadelphia and something related to Judaism (yeah hold the Biblical commentary.) My first idea for the Philly tat was the skyline, but skylines are subject to change and in twenty years it would suck if the real skyline didn't match my tattoo one. So my next thought is to just get the name "PHILADELPHIA" tattooed around my lower calf, or across my lower abdomen. As for Judaism, the thought was to get the Star of David and maybe a word in Hebrew, right across the heart. I don't have the pride burst necessary to get that one though. Maybe I'll get it done in Israel. That shit would be fucking dopechain. If anybody has ideas for either of those, let me know. Other tattoo ideas: Sigil of Baphomet, something Moby Dick related, etc.

Also dope: Kano.

Cop it.

Sunny day

Before break, my friend Dan was asking people if they wanted to be in an intramural dodgeball league. I said yes, not knowing that he was serious, but even if he was, not really caring. He was serious, and tonight at seven o'clock our team is going up against a group that's also from Macalester, I think. I don't really know.

Right now our team name is "Dupre Five" which is shit so I was thinking of different names. They include, all with "D5E" before the name:

Satanic Warmongers
Blasphemous Goatlords
Darkness
Eternal Blackness
Spear of Odin
Bloodwraiths
Nail Tornado
Blood Hurricane
Tools of the Dark Lord
Choir of the Goat

Et cetera. Any combination of the words goat, Satan, blasphemy, wraith, grim, and similar wintry terms will do. Let me know if you have any suggestions.

In other news, the new Darkthrone album "F.O.A.D." is a piece of shit. It sounds like a joke album put together by Seth Putnam or some other asshole. I don't understand how the same people who put together something as good as "Transilvanian Hunger," which I am listening to now, could vomit forth such festering waste. There's a song on the new album titled "Canadian Metal." Come on guys, are you serious? I love Canadian metal and Cryptopsy as much as anybody else, but there is no need for true Norwegian black metal fiends to make a song about it, though the song itself is hardly songly enough to be called a song. I think there are two guitar notes (singular) played at most and the drums are a cheap fucking deathcore rip-off. Deathcore? Are you serious? Go put on some fucking eyeliner if you're going to stumble down that trash-strewn road. Sing in Norwegian for god's/Satan's sake.

In order to maintain Darkthrone's good name, or what good name it once had, I will link "Transilvanian Hunger" so that people can feel the frost of real kvlt metal.Get at it here. It is a raw, vaguely minimalist black metal album that has been deemed essential by pretty much every son or daughter of the darkness. Not to mention that the cover, Fenriz holding a candelabra and screaming, is vast grim.

Windir

The past few days have been obnoxious as hell, all culminating in yesterday. Essentially, the bike I spent mad money and time on does not work, it is too small to accommodate the rear wheel and the chain properly. That was a bitch. I was really grumpy yesterday. Now there are two bike corpses lying against the wall in my room, and I don't know when I will be able to fix them, because I don't have all the necessary tools. Maybe this weekend? Maybe sooner? I don't know, but they are leering at me until I deal with them. And my hands are red raw and covered in bike grease that won't come off.

Here is a picture of Philadelphia.
More later.

Funeral Doom

Classes have started. This semester's line-up:

Poetry of the Environment- dope. We are reading good poets and the teacher has a great reading voice.
Exploring the Solar System- decent. I can't figure out whether or not the professor (Karl Wirth) is gay, but he seems to be excited about the material which is a good thing. I feel confident about the class due to my astronomy class last semester. I just hope that it's interesting and not entirely about the sedimentary composition of Ganymede or something like that. Ganymede is the shit though, that planet has water volcanoes all over the place.
Crafts of Writing Poetry- awesome. I wasn't sure I would get into it but Ping Wang/Wang Ping, whatever her name is, liked my writing samples and let me in. She seems brisk but really in the know. I think I will get a lot out of it.
Intro to Sociology- great. The professor is rad and it doesn't seem like it will be especially brutal workload-wise, plus the material is interesting.

Word! In addition, I am actually going to get involved in Mac Jewish Organization, Swing Club (I went last night and it was really fun), hopefully getting a radio show with Max, men's choir and maybe Mac Singers, getting a band together with Bassam, and who knows what else. I still would like a social life. Max, Mikey, Dan and I are also beginning Foodquest, the journey for good food in the Twin Cities, this weekend. Yeah.

Still kind of enjoying sitting around in my room listening to black metal though. My recommendation today is Nortt.

Both grim and frostbitten. Reclusive Danish composer of funeral doom, with some dark classical influences. Brooding music. I love this shit. Mournful Monuments is a collection of his first few releases, all of it is top notch. Download it here. The password is "thetruewarmongers". Enjoy it in a cocoon of your own hatred.

St. Paul

Apologies for the lapse. My friend Mikey and I spent the last two days traveling from the eastern seaboard, my dear Philadelphia, to the back fucking woods of the Midwest. Welcome back to college. Fantastic.

The reason it took us some time to get out here was because instead of copping out and taking an airplane, we took Amtrak. It was the shit, for serious. The first leg of the journey was from Washington D.C. to Chicago, and it took about seventeen hours. It was enjoyable. We had dinner in the dining car, rolling through western Pennsylvania or Ohio or somewhere, and it was not too expensive and decent enough. The seats were about 3/4ths of a bed, and we didn't even have a sleeping car. They reclined and had big legrests and it was comfortable. I slept well, with the only complaint being that one of our neighbors snored rather brutally. Nonetheless, it was great. Mikey and I watched The Hebrew Hammer and it was fantastic, awful, but perfect traveling-movie material, especially when the viewers are Jews.

When we got to Chicago we had some free time around the Sears Tower area. We were going to go up to the top floor of said tower, but it was cloudy and expensive so we said fuck that and just walked around. It was snowing. We went to the Chicago Public Library and it was surprisingly small, but maybe we just didn't get into the heart of the building. I was very impressed with the architecture in Chicago. Everything was ornate, but modern. Then we ate pizza at some place called Giordano's which is great, apparently, or a chain, one of the two, but I enjoyed it nonetheless.

Then the train from Chicago to Minneapolis. Long. We found some other Macalester students onboard and talked to them, which was great, and played cards and ate lots of food. Everything was swell until literally ten minutes before we were to pull into the station in the Twin Cities, where a car swerved enormously out of its way to crash into the tail end of our train, setting itself on fire in the process. We were then stalled for an hour. It was not fun. But eventually we moved, got to the station, and got back to Macalester.

The semester starts tomorrow. I feel as if I have a lot to do in preparation, and I do (buying books, learning where my classes meet) but it still hasn't really set in yet that I am back at college doing work. Fuck that shit. I miss Philadelphia.

Seeing my friends is nice, though.

Skate Videos Are Pretty Cool

Youtube is the most valuable time-wasting instrument that god has given to man. I don't even think that video games can beat it in terms of sheer quantity of stuff and subjects covered. I don't even need to get into this. You know it already it. And the thing is, Youtube has something for everyone: sports clips, presidential campaign coverage, movie trailers and footage, on and on ad infinitum. And everybody has their preference.

When I waste time on Youtube, I do it by watching skate (aggressive inline, what a shit term) videos. It's quick and accessible. Tonight before dinner I was online and I watched an edit made by a skate videographer from the northeast United States- Chris Majette- of northeastern skaters, and then another one by a southeastern videographer- Jamie Olmstead- of southeastern skaters. It came to me that the two editing styles, and even the skating itself, were drastically different. I have full videos (actual ones, not just Youtube) that both of them have made, but I guess it took watching distinct edits back-to-back to show me it.

It basically comes down to this: the northeast is hectic as all hell, and the southeast is relaxed. In the northeast edit (check it out here) Majette uses a post-hardcore song, rapid shot transitions with no effects, and crops the individual clips to begin only a split second before or right as the trick occurs, with little after the landing. It gives the edit a frantic pace. In the southeast, however, Olmstead slows everything down by the exact opposite; the song is gentler, he uses transition effects, and shows lots of run-up and landing. I would love to credit this to the stereotype of people being nice and slow in the south, while northeasterners are harried and mean, and I just might. Regardless, they are both enjoyable.

I am getting sleepy so I will cut this post off here. In the meantime, download the new demo by my funeral doom solo project, Oppen Gråv. The link is here. Enjoy, and more info about it will be posted tomorrow.

Sandman

This afternoon, I tried to figure out how to format this page so it looked cooler. Well, that didn't work, and now there is a lopsided picture of Philadelphia at the top of the blog that I can't figure out how to get rid of. But when I get that shit fixed, watch out, because it's gonna be hot fire.

Anyway, I spent most of the day at Border's have my mind torn to shreds what I think is the greatest comic book of all time (note that such a judgment does not include anything Star Wars related, because the galaxy far, far away occupies an entirely separate realm.)
Sandman, by Neil Gaiman. Dear sweet god. This is the greatest thing that DC Comics has ever done, and that portfolio includes Batman and Superman. This is the kind of thing that rules over the entire domain of fantasy literature. And I've only read two of the ten volumes so far.

One reviewer called it a "comic book for intellectuals." As much as I would like to argue that comic books are just as intellectual as whatever that smartass must be reading, it does accurately address the fact that Sandman is not just a series about some tall, dark male who is inherently good systematically destroying his evil adversaries; oftentimes, there are no adversaries for him (Morpheus, the king of the dreamworld, and the series' protagonist) to defeat at all, and he can seem quite evil himself. Through his role as a dream lord, the comic goes into some of the darker aspects of mankind, both physically and psychologically; a notable story arc involves a convention of serial killers whose keynote address is by a demon created to promote the existence of fear in the mortal realm- and, as the reader learns, was created by Morpheus himself, making his nature even less clear. However, this doesn't mean that the comic abandons all format; there are epic fights, and the theme good versus bad does make an appearance. Also, the demon mentioned above has empty, toothed eye sockets.

On the subject of bizarre shit like eye-teeth, the visuals in Sandman are some of the most terrifying and creative pieces of imagery I have ever seen in any genre. Gaiman's artists, whose names are beyond me right now, create ridiculous monsters, reshape long-standardized images and characters (Death, for example, is a beautiful young woman, rather than some Skelator dude in a hoodie) and make these endless plains of existence (such as Morpheus' dreamworld) that just make my fucking head spin. One example I found notable was how Hell was illustrated; rather than a big pit of fire and lava, artists created a number of vast, hopeless-looking spaces, such as the Forest of Suicides, where the dead become trees and talk endlessly of their misery. The castle of Hell, from where Satan, Azazel, and Beelzebub rule, looks like it is built of human flesh rather than stone. Things like these are what shape the universe of the series in a way that is "unique and original," to quote my film professor. Also notable are the mixed-media whole-page artworks at the beginning of each issue, which are suitably dark and haunting and give the entire comic a more diverse texture.

What is most amazing, to me at least, is the fact that it has re-inspired me to write fantasy. I haven't written fiction in months, and to be suddenly jolted out of that slump by a high-grade comic is so goddamn refreshing. I'm currently brainstorming a crossover between all the different worlds I've thought up. If I feel brave and actually do some writing, maybe I'll post some of it on here later on.

Spending hours in Borders can be so refreshing.

"The Great Northeast"

This morning my brother and I went up to Warminster so I could pick up a bike frame from some guy off of Craigslist. We get there no problem, meet the guy at a bike store, and the exchange is made.


Word. Centurion Accordo from the late nineteen-eighties. Japanese. I am using it as the base for my new fixed gear (which I can't really build until I get back to school, but that's in a week so it's a fine) and it is in nice condition. However, this is not what the post is about.

So we head back towards 276 to come home. At the fork in the road between 276 E and 276 W, for no fucking reason at all, I take the eastern route, which is clearly not the way to get home. So we're heading towards New Jersey now, which is cause for alarm in and of itself. I think to myself, it's fine, we can just get off at the next exit and turn around. Oh wait- the next exit is in the middle of one of the highway knots that are totally unnavigable. Scratch that. I see a sign that proudly advertise I-95 somewhere nearby. So I follow that.

Within ten minutes I realize that we are lost somewhere in Northeast Philadelphia, charging down Roosevelt Boulevard (or, by its other name, the Daniel Faulkner Memorial Highway. Yeesh.) There are strip malls on every side, and we count three Boston Markets in a five minute stretch. One of the six hundred car dealerships we pass has a sign that says, "Gary Barbera loves the GREAT NORTHEAST!!!" Those northeasteners must buy a shit ton of cars, because there is no other reason for anyone to like that place.

I ask for directions twice, and only get good information the second time around. Following the signs, it takes another twenty minutes to finally reach I-95. We have been looking for the goddamn highway for about an hour at this point. Finally, we got onto it and barreled our way back past the real city, through southwest, and back to home. The point of the story: the northeast is a trap and one should stay the fuck away. Also, know your driving directions.

Don't associate with Gary Barbera, either, or anyone who associates with that place.

The Blessing of Philadelphia, Vol. I

My friend Kelly came up from Charlottesville this weekend to visit me, and, more importantly, Philadelphia. So we went to the city and I showed her around and I noticed that there were two things that kept coming up in regards to the city: first, I kept describing it, in a positive and proud way, as filthy, and second, that we ate. And kept eating. And ate some more.

The blessing of Philadelphia is in its food. You can get anything you fucking want here. We have ballin-ass Chinese, Indian, Ethiopian, southeast Asian, Mexican, Cuban, Italian, sushi, anything. And that isn't even to include our junk food, which is probably the best on earth. The cheesesteak is the pinnacle of a sandwich. There is nothing more to say about it. Our pizza, wings, hoagies, hamburgers, and roast pork sandwich (which if you haven't had, get at or get out) rival anywhere else/are better than anywhere else. We win.

I think what really made me realize this was going to college in the culinary void that is the Midwest. Okay, maybe it's not a void, but it cannot compare. They do breakfast well and there are some dope burritos but that's it. So when I went to college and found that people in the Midwest are talking about Domino's when they order pizza, well, I almost died, and then decided to keep going just so I could have that real jawn from Philadelphia again.

This is the first of many, many posts about how much I love food in Philadelphia.

Anyway, last night I had the good fortune to see the Extraordinaires in their warehouse in North Philly. They are some stand-up guys- Jay, the lead singer/guitarist, is one of the friendliest and most magnetic people I have ever met. You just want to be friends with this guy. So check out the website (linked above) because I think they have some songs to download and you won't regret listening up. Buy shit from them too, it's worth it.

In rap-related news, I love Lil' Wayne again. I mean, I never stopped loving him, but I just re-realized the other day how fucking good he is. He is insane, a full-package rapper that kills shit so consistently, mixtapes, major releases, guest spots, anything. Plus he is one of the coolest looking rappers since Biggie was on the scene in his mafia suits. Every rapper nowadays just puts on some Bapes and dangles a dozen chains off his neck, which Weezy does too, but in a much different way. Maybe it's due to to his dope dreads and his full-body gangster-ass tats, and his weird sneer, but he just looks better than anybody else.
In addition, he's insane. For evidence download this song. It's "I Feel Like Dying" off of his upcoming album Da Drought is Ova Pt. II. In it, he pretty much just breathes into the microphone about how high he is all the time. The sample is creepy as shit. At this point, he probably goes through a key a day straight to his nose. Also, the song has caused some drama due to the fact that if you play it backwards, it apparently has some subversive message about being dead. I don't know if Weezy would take that much time to write (barely) intelligible lyrics that are also intelligible when played in reverse (which is not an insult, just a testament to the fact that Lil' Wayne freestyles almost all of his shit.) Regardless, check it out here and make up your own mind. Cop it.

Intro/R.A.M.B.O.

This is the fourth time I have tried to keep a blog. Hence the fantastic name. The first time was in middle school, when I started a Pitas page because this girl who I liked named Zoe had one and I wanted to be friends with her (this is the pre-Facebook/Myspace era, what ancient times.) I actually kept that one up for a while, and even experimented with HTML to make it look cool. Eventually I fucked it up though, so that didn't work out. The second time was in late ninth grade, when all of my friends had a Livejournal, so I started one too. I must have had that thing going until almost eleventh grade. I would write these fantastically long posts about the minutiae of my day and how I was so frustrated when my parents wouldn't let me go to shows or whatever (wtf) so that was wack as shit. Then the third time was after I came back from Italy last April and wanted to have a fashion photoblog because I was in love with The Sartorialist but then I realized I lived in the suburbs and didn't even have a decent digital camera. So that fell through. And now this, my fourth attempt.

While I probably am going to talk about things in my life that are not unbelievably interesting, I want this to mostly be an arts blog, but "arts" is a huge term, so expect many different things. I'll probably talk about music and fashion and other things that I think are dope as shit.

So without further ado, I'll get into it.


R.A.M.B.O. (Revolutionary Anarchist Mosh Bike Overthrow) are the fucking shit. They're a straight edge vegan anarchist thrashcore band from good old filthy Philadelphia. God they're good. Politically charged, harsh and dissonant, they still have some incredibly catchy guitar riffs. At their live shows, people in the audience would come dressed as Vikings and police officers, and during the show they would do battle on huge cardboard artifices. They amicably broke up in May 2007, but not before throwing one last show with pretty much the greatest lineup ever- World/Inferno Friendship Society, Witch Hunt, Paint it Black (I think) and so many more. I had a ticket to that show but it coincided with the graduation party of some of my best friends and plus I was sick. So it's tough to decide whether or not I regret not going. It would be fucking nuts for sure, but I might've needed the day off. Anyway, the album cover above is from "Bring It!", their second full-length release. It's raw as shit. Cop it here. Standout tracks are 1, 7, 9, 14 and 18. The whole thing is awesome though. And if you like what you hear, then buy the album because it is definitely fucking worth it.

I see Tony Pointless (one of the members of the band) at R5 shows a lot. I wonder if he would be weirded out if I came up to him and begged him to get the band back together. That sounds like an awful sitcom pilot.